Pakistan v England

Mohammad Hafeez, whose middle name might be 'Bloody' by the end of this series, celebrates his half-century. Photograph: Lakruwan Wanniarachchi/AFP/Getty Images

WICKET! Pakistan 176-3 (Hafeez LBW b Swann 88) Swann has struck. Hafeez premeditated a sweep at a full delivery that slipped under his bat and hit him on the toe. It looked a really good shout, and Bruce Oxenford raised the finger. Hafeez decided to review the decision, hoping he had got outside the line. He hadn't, and his fine innings ends 12 short of a century.

56th over: Pakistan 176-2 (Hafeez 88, Younis 24) A maiden from Anderson to Younis, including a big drive at fresh air from the final delivery. For a second I thought he'd nicked it. Anyone got anything to talk about? "There's a certain low-price chain pub over the road from Farringdon tube that opens before rush hour at least," says Elliott Carr-Barnsley. "That would certainly be a 'good' start."

55th over: Pakistan 176-2 (Hafeez 88, Younis 24) Swann's 13th over disappears 13. Younis drives very pleasantly through wide mid-off for four and then Hafeez slog-sweeps mightily for six. Swann is being handled with worrying ease, and looks a bit low on confidence. His Test form hasn't been great in the last 15 months; he averaged a fraction under 40 in the Ashes and a fraction over 40 against India, although he had a good series at home to Sri Lanka.

54th over: Pakistan 163-2 (Hafeez 82, Younis 17) That ball from Anderson definitely reversed a touch, swinging back in to Hafeez. The next delivery is gunbarrel straight and timed supremely through midwicket for four.
"Seems England's bowlers have ignored the Teesra in favour of the Teasmade," teehees Gary Naylor, "as Pakistan's batsmen appear to be having them for breakfast."

53rd over: Pakistan 159-2 (Hafeez 78, Younis 17) Swann replaces Tremlett and is worked for three singles. Younis still doesn't quite look 'in', but he's been there for 47 balls now and that's ominous for England. Meanwhile, Andy Bull has dug out another gem from the Chris Gayle Twitter archive. "It has been a while since I lived in Clerkenwell," says John Atherton, "but in answer to Glenn Cawston's query about pubs, I'd suggest he tries the Smithfield market area, the pubs there also do great meaty breakfasts."

52nd over: Pakistan 156-2 (Hafeez 76, Younis 16) BAH. Younis waves his bat at a wider delivery from Anderson, and the ball flies just short of Strauss at first slip. England have bowled with excellent discipline since lunch, with only 18 runs from nine overs. Meanwhile, here's more from Chris Gayle.
"As the relentless grind of Asian cricket wears on, you can still use Wikipedia, as they helpfully point out, just turn off java-scripting for the site and hey-presto the font of all (internet) knowledge starts to flow again," says Andy Cronk, as 99.94 per cent of journalists breathe an almighty one. "As for the cricket, I stick with my about 200 runs behind, but the pitch seems to have draw written all over it (admittedly spelt as Jazz (whatever that is, I imagine a soft-drink))." Maybe, but England will have a helluva long time to bat – six sessions, maybe more. (And I bet Pakistan get a lot more than 392.) Six sessions is a lot in view of the fact that Saeed Ajmal has built a small village inside their subconscious.

51st over: Pakistan 156-2 (Hafeez 76, Younis 16) A quiet over from Chris Tremlett. Meanwhile, here's Chris Gayle. "Excellent piece from James Marsh, and I think he's absolutely right," says Steve Hudson. "There seems to have been some kind of cosy agreement between the ECB and the Dubai authorities not to create too much of a fuss either way over the human rights issues. It has the potential to fester until the cricket authorities are forced to address it."

50th over: Pakistan 153-2 (Hafeez 75, Younis 14) It's the 50th over and, as predicted by Selve, here comes Jimmy Anderson. His first ball is angled in towards Younis, who again waves around his front pad as the ball slips down the leg side. He gets it right later in the over, whipping a ball off middle stump and through square leg for three. Anderson is hiding the ball in his run-up so that the batsmen don't know which way it isn't reversing. It suggests they are confident that it will, however. "If Broad develops the conundrum, it'll officially become 'The Enforcer Conundrum', which sounds quite like a book by a love child of Robert Ludlum and Dan Brown," says Aatman Chaudhary.

49th over: Pakistan 150-2 (Hafeez 75, Younis 11) Younis is beaten chasing a wider one from Tremlett and then, next ball, is so nearly trapped in front by a fuller, straighter delivery. Since lunch Pakistan have scored 12 from six overs. "Surely it is part of your job to read up on the commentary in previous sessions before you go online," says Peter Kunzil. "Comments like 'Have people been talking about natural length this morning then?' make you look like an idiot – which you are not. This happens too often on OBO. Get your acts together and actually read the OBO from the previous session." As much as I would love to sit around with my feet on the desk marvelling at every word emanating from Bull's fingers, there are myriad other things for a person to do when he or she is not OBOing. We try to read the previous session, of course, but invariably there isn't time. Oh, and I'll have you know I am an idiot.

48th over: Pakistan 149-2 (Hafeez 75, Younis 11) Younis opens the face and steers a wider delivery from Broad to third man for four. Then Hafeez wears a well-directed short ball on the shoulder. "If we follow Copestake's logic and make a Countdown-style conundrum out of Teesra we find it is an anagram of Easter," says Robin Hazlehurst. "The answer is staring us in the face, bowl Easter eggs at them, that'll confuse the wotsits out of them. Or maybe just sprinkle Creme Eggs on the pitch, jelly-baby style in a most elaborate sledge."

47th over: Pakistan 144-2 (Hafeez 75, Younis 6) A disciplined maiden from Tremlett. Matt Prior said last night that it was important England didn't "chase the game", and that's in evidence here. "Umar Gul started to reverse it after 50 overs yesterday, which is later than usual," says Lord Selvey. "But it was there. I'd expect Jimmy to come on round about then." Did he reverse it much? I only remember one or two balls going, although I wasn't paying full attention. I was doing the OBO.

46th over: Pakistan 144-2 (Hafeez 75, Younis 6) This is subcontinental Asian cricket as nature intended. Bloody hard work for the bowlers, basically; the slow, systematic destruction of Hope. Broad mixes his length up a bit in that over, another good one, with a couple of very full deliveries to Younis. Still no sign of reverse swing, though, and you might have better luck waiting for Godot, or for Radiohead to embrace melody again. "You know what else is rather scary?" says Phil Podolsky. "A world without Wikipedia. Today's blackout is not very serious as you can use Google cache; but everyone working in online "content" is royally screwed if it's really gone. Though to give me a proper scare they'll have to take down all the sleepy kittens videos on YT: that's what my working online is really down to. On a related note..." Oh my goodness. That is the most adorable thing I've seen since Andy Bull shaved his beard off I stumbled out of the Curzon Soho at around 8pm on October 22 2001 after watching Amelie for the first time.

45th over: Pakistan 141-2 (Hafeez 72, Younis 6) This is not a typical Pakistan batting line-up: they are cold and methodical, in the image of their impressive captain Misbah-ul-Haq. Tremlett has a biggish shout for LBW against Younis Khan, whose got stuck as he played around his front pad. Bruce Oxenford said not out, and after a bit of thought England decided not to review. Height was an issue, and it might have been sliding down too. Replays show it was just hitting the top of the leg bail, so it would have stayed with the original decision. Oxenford has had a very good game so far. England's tactics are different for each batsman – very straight to Younis early in his innings, and a fifth-stump line to Hafeez. "The idea of a natural length only emerged in the last ten years or so," says Gary Naylor. "Before that, bang-it-in bowlers like Garner and McGrath had yorkers that were unplayable at times and swing bowlers like Wasim and Marshall had horrible skidding bouncers that hurt people. I think natural length may just be a comfort blanket for bowlers who really should be able to be hitting the top of off stump more often than not." Have people been talking about natural length this morning then?

44th over: Pakistan 138-2 (Hafeez 70, Younis 6) Stuart Broad, England's best bowler this morning, will start the session. He starts with a maiden to Younis Khan. England could really do with picking up Younis before he gets his eye in. He averages almost 80 since his recall 14 months ago and, as Nasser Hussain says on Sky, knows how to get huge hundreds. There's also a bit of talk on Sky as to whether the ball will reverse – Bumble reckons maybe not, because the outfield is pretty lush. You have to feel a bit for England's bowlers; this was always going to be seriously hard yakka, and being bowled out for 192 has made it even harder. "England missed a trick not developing some mysterious balls of their own over their break, or having someone work on one in a lab for when they returned," says Ian Copestake. "We could have countered the Teesra with a Conundrum."